July 6, 2015
Woozens! Your dedicated
snoop reporter is BACK with the scoop of a lifetime!
Ever since the dramafest that was Prom 2k15 (or, as I like to call it, a paparazzo’s dream come true), rumors swirled around Woozworld regarding rejected ZackWooz. Would he remain the gentleman he’s seemed to be since helping to rescue his beloved Jenny in February? Or would his disappointment cause him to go bad to the bone as his alter ego KontvonKlokz? Well Woozens, WONDER NO MORE. Your Woozarazzi is here to settle the score!
An source inside Woozworld has managed to retrive this tearstained letter from the floor of KonvonKlokz HQ!
But that’s not all! Despite Zack’s “dire” warnings, our insider has provided his whereabouts, EXCLUSIVE to Wooz Weekly!
“Zack has been partial to islands and tropical climates ever since his time-travel mishaps way back when,” our source reveals. “He’s obviously gonna buy a private island! I mean, where else would you expect a billionaire time-traveling recluse to go?”
You heard it here first! Anyone looking for Woozworld’s most famous bitter blond should take up beach-combing!
Yours with all the news that I can print,